What does it mean to be happy? For many people, being happy means different things. Some may think that love, money, and success brings happiness. I decided to do some research, first I went to the dictionary in which it defined happy as “delighted, pleased, glad, as over a particular thing: to be happy to see a person. 2. Characterized by …. pleasure, contentment, or joy.” In other words, happiness is different for different people. Its not a “one size fits all” for everyone. Recently, I was talking to someone about love and relationships and I have mentioned to them when it comes to my friends and love ones that I just want them to be happy. Yet, I really had to check myself after the conversation because the way I may envision happiness and what I believe brings one happiness may be totally different from someone else’s view.
Here’s what I learned – being happy is both easier and harder than we think. It’s easier because it’s up to us – and it’s harder because it’s up to us. I remember while traveling to LA on vacation at the beginning of the year watch an episode of TEDX Talks about happiness. The presenter happened to be a Happiness Expect (please forgive me for not remembering his name and I was surprised to learn there was such a expert). He mentioned that if we know what you have, we can only predict about 10% of your happiness level. 90% of your happiness depends on how you process the world. He also talked about how to “get to happy” in 21 days: Write down gratitudes, Journal and try to stay focused on something positive, exercise, mediate, and perform an act of kindness. He mentioned by doing these 5 steps, you can preprogram your brain to stay positive in turn produces happiness.
One thing that I am learning everyday is that you can do anything but not everything. What others have going on is not your concern, focus on your life and energy, for you cannot control others or others situations. When you get involved in others situations or in other words “business” as my mother would say, you can sometimes do more harm then good. Even if your intentions were good and you were coming from a good place, you are taking on negative energy in some form or fashion. Also, we must understand that their circumstance and truth is their own, and you are the odd man out so it will be difficult for you to understand what the other person may be going through or see it through their perspective. The best thing you can do is first, do for self and make sure your needs are being met. Second, if the opinion or help wasn’t asked, don’t offer. Pray for them and support them in the best way you can and sometimes that involves knowing when you close your mouth. At the end of the day, happiness starts within ourselves. A positive mind, positive living results in happiness and from there, happiness spreads to others. Find and keep your happy 🙂